Deadpool gets pus WADE GET AWAY FROM MY KEYBORED
by GreyKing46
Summary: Deadpool. Wade Wilson. The Merc With A Mouth. Watch as he goes on another random ass adventure! Only this time, he get's ALL the girls! Yes, that is right, ALL the girls! And he is happy. DeadpoolXHarem! WadeXHarem! Harem! LEMONS! Co-written by GhostKaiser23
1. Lady Luck

Hello everyone!

So...

Yea.

Deadpool is awesome.

I think we all know this.

And he is one of mine AND Ghost favorite characters, as any of our readers can tell. In Harem of Latveria we brought him up whenever we could, in Spidey's Harem we paired Ben Reilly with Lady Deadpool... just because we thought it would be awesome!, and our Lady Deadpool chapter's for Spidey One-Shots are the ones we have the most fun writing.

So, we are making a Deadpool Harem fic!

Yes, you just bread that right.

But, we are NOT revealing the harem for one!

And another point is that since this is Deadpool getting girls there will be less character and plot and more action and lemons than any of our other work, either mine or Ghost's.

So, yea. Expect insanity.

And another note! Since MULTIPLE girls find Deadpool repulsive, Ghost and I may... 'have a hand' in some of the girls falling for Mr Wilson. *winks*

Remember: This fic is NOT meant to be taken seriously. AT. ALL.

Co-Written by: GhostKaizer

Disclaimer: Don't own Deadpool or Marvel

* * *

 **Deadpool gets pus... WADE GET AWAY FROM MY KEYBORED**

 **Chapter 1: Lady Luck**

* * *

Scene: Downtown apartment.

Location: New York

Residents: One stuffed dog, 169,974 pancakes and one kickassasin

What is a kickassin? An assassin that kicks so much ass he has threatened the authors to... I mean... the author's love him so much that they have decided to give him his own super awesome story... yea... that's it

Sitting in his AWESOME lounge chair in his red and black lounge pants with katana motif was an non-scarred blonde haired Canadian drinking beer with ninety seven empty bottles surrounding his flat. "Damn healing factor. STILL can't get drunk! Still I got my looks."

"And I must say, while I enjoyed your old look, you are SO much more sexy like this." An alluring female voice whispered into his ear as pink arms wrapped around his shoulders, black nails dancing across his chest

"Hmm...Hey babe." the kickassassin smiled

"Wade..." the alluring female spoke

"Yeah my lovely wife?" Wade answered staring at his slender and VERY attractive wife...not that the writers are trying to hit on her or anything.

"When are you going to take these beer bottles out?" She asked semi-seriously.

"Or..." he grinned, pulling her onto his lap "I can make you scream."

"Bottles first. Sexy time right after." Wade's wife stroked his nose cutely

"Okay. One clean up, coming up." Wade answered and pushed a button making all the beer bottles disappear. "Now then..."

"Come here baby." Wade's wife kissed him passionately

Okay... let's ACTUALLY talk about who she is. The pink skinned, black haired sexy girl wearing a black and purple outfit along with gold accents on the outfit was the Queen of the monsters and a Succubus called Shiklah

"Hmm...Wade..." Shiklah moaned

She married Wade after he was told to escort her to Dracula to be HIS bride. But Wade as the ladies man as he is won the heart of Shiklah and married HIM instead.

Wade grinned as he was grouping his wives body as he kissed her exposed clevedge

'Hmm...What I could do with some whipped cream, cherries and a banana.' Wade thought as he teased Shiklah's nipples.

That was when a knock on the door came

"Oh come on!" Wade snapped at the door. "One second." He produced a .44 Magnum from his lounge pants...one of the OTHER things that wasn't ten inches long. Wade opened the door and pointed his gun at the person who knocked on their door. "WHAT?!"

Standing there was a woman with a large chest wearing a skin tight black leather outfit That didn't hide her chest, heck with the zip pulled so low she was showing it off! She had snow white skin with her black hair cut in a small bob and a large black circle over over her right eye. This was Domino, one of Wade'a oldest... 'friends?'

"Really Wade. After all this time?" Domino asked

"Domino? Why're you here?" Wade asked

"We got a job." she frowned, slamming a letter into his chest

"Okay...Give me a half hour." Wade answered

"Wade." Domino snapped lightly

"Fifteen minutes." Wade changed his answer

"Wade!" Domino snapped again

"Five minutes! I'll keep my hat on!" Wade groaned revealing he had a captain's hat magically appear on his head

Domino frowned and slapped him upside the head

"OW! Jeez! Okay, okay!" Wade groaned

"Wade...who's there?" Shiklah asked

"... who's that?" Domino asked

The female assassin's eyes narrowing in annoyance since Deadpool ALWAYS flirted with her and tried to get sexual favors

"That's my wife. Shiklah." Wade answered

"You're wife..." Domino maintained her stare.

"Ye..." he started before his brains where blown out

"Nice to meet you." Domino said coldly to the Monster Queen before she walked away "Tell him to get there ASAP!"

"Fine." Shiklah sighed as her husband began to reform his brains

"Ow, ow, ow, ow! She SHOT me!" Wade groaned

"She told me to get you to your job ASAP." Shiklah pouted

"She SHOT me!"

"You want me to kiss your boo-boo?" Shiklah asked

"Oh babe..." Wade hugged her tenderly

The two laughed as they fell to the floor, soon moaning

* * *

*time skip... six hours later*

"What's keeping that mutate son-of-a-bitch?" Domino tapped her foot impatiently.

By her heeled feet was a Burger King package, as she got one from how hungry she got waiting for him. And with how she was standing, even if someone was there, they would not see she had one hand slid under her catsuit playing with her pussy 'God where IS he?!' Domino moaned

And just as she said it the Merc with the Mouth walked into the hangar fully armoured and wielding his trusty rusty twin katana, magnum guns, grenades, bear traps and MULTIPLE gun clips. "HI DOM!" He yelled, right behind her

"Mother!" Domino snapped then slapped Deadpool in his face

"OW! Again?!" Wade snapped

"Do you ALWAYS keep girls waiting?" Domino growled

"No, that's why I was late... and I was booking tickets for my movie." Deadpool grinned

"Oh...okay. Come on our job's still open." Domino answered heading for the plane.

As Domino walked off Wade saw how she swayed her voluptuous ass in her tight leather suit. "Hey, stop describing this Ghost!" Wade snapped at the Co-Writer

"Wade, if I DIDN'T describe it like that people, wouldn't understand." Ghost answered

"Fair enough." Wade answered

"WADE Get your ass here!" Domino shouted

"Yeah, yeah I'm coming!" Wade rolled his eyes.

'Sexy assed cocktease.' He thought, following her but also slightly wondering why his cheek felt a bit wet...

* * *

*Time Skip, The job location*

Wade and Domink where running through a forest, avoiding gun fire

"This was a simple job ans you SOMEHOW got the MILITARY after us!" Domino yelled

"At least I'm never boring!" He laughed

"You're insane Wade!" Domino shouted

"They're heading for the clearing!" a soldier shouted

"We've got no cover there!" Domino answered

"Don't worry I've got it covered!" Wade answered as he held a detonator in his hand.

"... what?!" She snapped

As the two ran to their plane Wade pressed the detonator...and nothing happened

"Cheap ass, worthless! Now I KNOW I got this from The Dark Knight prop list!" He threw the detonator away and the trees behind them exploded collapsing on the military giving them time to escape.

"Lucky." Domino grinned, winking

"Coming from the woman who manipulates luck on a daily basis." Wade chuckled

"As I said, Lucky." she grinned at him as they stopped running

"So we got the package?" Wade asked

"Right here." Domino answered

As she patted the pouch that was RIGHT above the junction between her legs

"NICE..." Wade gave a wide smile

"Come on." Domino rolled her eyes.

"What?" He asked innocently, following

As they got into their plane they began to fly off back to base. As Domino clicked the Auto-Pilot on she stretched herself out in the chair.

"So... a wife." She said

"Yep." Wade answered sharpening his hunting knife.

"How long?" Domino asked

"Huh?" Wade asked

"How long you been married?" Domino specified

"Hmm... I'd say... three to four months." He shrugged

"Yet you STILL kept asking me to pose naked, covered in chocolate sauce with strawberry's on my nipples and clit, and take pictures of me like like that... 'preferably fingering myself' as you said... ans give them to you! And sign it, again you preferring me to sign it WITH my... 'juice'... saying 'Oh Wade, you super sexy hunk, I need you. Here is a picture to convince you to make me yours?!" She yelled

"Yep." Wade answered simply "Shouldn't I have?"

"... your MARRIED DUMBASS!"

"People besides me have done it before." Wade responded calmly

"You...You...!" Domino's rage began to build.

"Me what?" he sighed

"You BASTARD!" She shouted as she flung herself at Wade

"GAH!" He yelled as he was knocked over

"The hell Domino!" Wade snapped as he was being kissed by the luck manipulator

"Bastard. Bastard! BASTARD!" She chanted between kisses

'The hell's going on with her?!...Not that I'm complaining...but if Shiklah knows about this!' Wade thought "Domino wait!"

"WHAT?!" She snapped

"About my wife." Wade attempted to warn her

"Oh fuck your wife!" Domino dismissed it as she aimed to rip his suit off

"That's what I do!" He yelled as his rock hard abs where revealed, Domino's black lips kissing and licking all over them

'Oh god!' Both of them moaned as Wade stroked his fingers through Domino's hair.

Domino, absolutely loving the taste of him, began to pull down Wade's pants and boxers revealing his super massive and thick cock "Whoa! You're bigger than I remember." Domino was amazed

"Pays to know the right people." Wade smiled

"Wait... when did we sleep together before?" Wade asked before he moaned as Domino began to use both hands to jack him off, unable to do it properly with just one

"Hmmmm..." Domino tried to think of a viable answer "Independence Day?"

"Oh yeah the Fireworks Explosive Bang...Good times." Wade smiled

Domino grinned, lowering her head and wrapped her black lips around his balls before sucking

Wade groaned, his head falling back. Domino didn't stop her assault, her hungry mouth sucking both of Deadpool's balls hungrily while both of her gloved hands slid up and down his shaft frantically and her eyes looked at his in hunger.

Soon, she changed her tactics though. She began to lick up and down his cock with her small hungry tongue, one hand still gliding up and down his shaft while the other one was now focused on his bulbous head

"Oh fuck Dom! You... you're so good!" Wade groaned "W... WAY better than anyway." Domino grinned before taking his head into her mouth and sucking while her now free hand unzipped her catsuit down past her ass, but kept her outfit on, and began to finger herself "Oh, oh god...Come here." Wade moaned as he managed to flip Domino's pussy above his mouth "Fingering yourself through your suit? Kinky girl." he moved her hand and began to lick her pussy

"Oh fuck! Wade!" She moaned, now rubbing him with both hands again while she licked at his head

"D-Domino! Jeez! I think...I think it's time for the "main course"!" Wade teased Domino's pussy and asshole.

Domino's answer was to get off Wade, onto her back with her legs spread wide and her gloved finger's spreading her pussy lips

"Oh fuck yeah..." Wade grinned as he positioned himself in front of Domino's dripping pussy.

"Show me you're not JUST all talk Wade." Domino teased

"Oh Lucky Girl, just you wait!" Wade grinned, and slammed himself to the hilt with one thrust

"FUCK! Oh shit!" Domino cursed as she felt Wade's erect member inside her pussy

"I hope you're ready cause we've got about..." Wade smiled as he looked at the ETA "Four HOURS till we land. And I'm VERY creative." Domino slapped him

"Shut up and fuck me!" Domino ordered

"Ooh...Do it again!" Wade smiled as he began to thrust inside Domino's pussy

Domino screamed in ecstasy, her head falling back and eyes rolled into her skull as Wade hit or rub EVERY one of her pleasure points with every small movement

Wade began to knead her breasts as he thrust into the mutant, Domino's nails were digging into Wade's back maintaining her grip on the Regenerating Degenerate. "OW! You been to a nail salon recently?" Wade asked as continued fucking Domino.

But Domino wasn't listening, she was moaning in pure nirvana with her tongue hanging weakly from her mouth which she was unable to close from the constant moaning of pleasure

"Alley-Oop!" Wade leaned back pulling Domino on top of him into the cowgirl position.

"Ah! Ah!" Domino moaned as the new position made her collapse on Wade.

And she came. Hard.

Domino panted heavily, she was drooling lightly on Wade's chest as Wade's cock slipped out of her pussy.

'Man...you were sex-starved weren't you?' Wade thought.

"Y... you haven't cumed yet." She panted, ignoring him as she slide off him and onto her knees "C... cum on my face!m like we where in a bad porno!"

"Alright. Just be careful you don't drown." Wade joked as he stood up jerking his cock off and came on Domino's face, missing her eyes.

Domino moaned sexily, slurping up the cum with a wide grin

"God we're such porn stars." Wade smiled as Domino licked his cock.

"... we still have 3and a half hours." Domino grinned sexily

"VERY true. And we can try something ELSE I've been practicing." Wade smiled

"Ooh...what?" Domino asked

"Just wait. Cause YOU won't be able to walk afterwards." Wade knelt down and began to make out with the luck manipulator.

* * *

*Time Skip*

Domino groaned as Wade walked out. Wade's suit was back on and her suit was zipped back up, her stomach slightly bulged out, with Wade carrying her bridal style

"I can't feel my legs." She smiled goofily, groaning as the cum in her body sloshed around with every step Wade took

"What is WITH you today?" He muttered "Not that I'm complaining of course!

"Hmm...just frustrated. You being married and all." Domino explained

"Damn." Wade muttered

"And where have YOU been my love?" Shiklah looked at her husband carrying Domino in his arms

'Oh shit!' Wade thought

"You had sex with another female and you did not invite me... meanie." The succubus pouted confusing the hell out of Deadpool... until he realized what sort of story he was on!

'Oh... this'll be AWESOME!' he thought happily "Well...we can pick up where we left off my dear." Wade smiled thanking the writers in his mind.

"Again? Five times didn't satisfy you last time?" Shiklah asked

"Enhanced stamina. What can you do?" Wade replied

"Healing Factor... he can't get tired easy." Domino muttered out "We did it six times on our way down here."

"Well then... we better get ready. And think about getting a bigger apartment, as we'd need more girls to satisfy our lovely Deadpool if he is as tireless as you say." Shiklah smiled, taking Domino from Wade and walking off

"I'll catch up! I need to do something first!" Deadpool called, before he teleported away

"I wonder where he's going?" Shiklah thought out loud

"Knowing Wade...Somewhere weird." Domino sighed nuzzling into Shiklah's breasts

Said succubus smiled "I think I'm going to like keeping you as a pet."

* * *

*with Wade*

The Merc With A Mouth appeared in an empty desert... and fell to his knees crying in joy. He ripped his mask off, held his arms to the sky, and called "GREY! GHOST! THANK YOU!"

"Just wait till he sees what we've got in store for him in the coming story." Ghost said to Grey with a smile

"Ssssh! Spoilers." Grey chuckled

"Er... IS this a super-hot sex filled Deadpool harem fic where I get with EVERY smoking hot babe?" Wade asked after a few seconds

"That's for us to know and you to experience Wade. But I PROMISE it'll be good." Ghost reassured him "Oh, one other thing." Ghost snapped his fingers and appeared a chimichanga/taco combo before him "Eat that. You're gonna need your strength."

"Thanks Ghost!"

And with his unhealthy food in hand, Wade teliported off home

"So... who next?" Grey asked

* * *

*with Wade*

"Honey's I'm HOME!" Wade smiled wiping off taco/chimichanga dressing from his lips.

There, on his bed, was his lovely wife and Domino, both naked... well, Domino had a choker on but that was it. Domino's stomach was back to normal, Shiklah's black lips surrounded by a white substance that showed she had drunk all her husbands cum out of both of Domino's holes mere seconds ago

"Holy shit..." Wade drooled and felt a bloody nose coming along.

"I hope you're ready for another round love." Shiklah asked sultrily

"Yea." Domino grinned, pulling his trousers and boxers down to his ankles "We need to get rod of this problem." She smiled, grabbing his big hard cock

"Well, I'm happy to oblige." Wade answered making out with the Luck Manipulator.

"Should I be jealous?" Shiklah asked teasing her pussy.

Domino moaned as she broke the kiss, her head falling into his chest

"No, just having fun." Wade smirked, pulling Shiklah into a kiss

As the two began to kiss Domino began to suck on Wade's cock for the...we lost track after the plane, time. And he was LOVING it...almost as much as she was.

Domino was moaning sexily as she bobbed her head up and down eagerly on his cock while Wade ran a hand through her hair

Shiklah moaned as she was playing with her pussy while kissing her husband.

'Oh GOD!' Wade thought as he came in Domino's mouth

Domino moaned loudly as she swallowed the cum happily

"Damn..." Wade moaned

"I think she's ready love." Shiklah smiled

"No. I wanna fuck you now." He grinned, pulling his cock from Domino's hungry mouth

"Hmm." Domino pouted

"Sorry. Lady Luck's on my wife's side for now." Wade answered

*In the domain of Lady Luck*

"Are you kidding me?!" The personified mistress of good fortune and probabilities deadpanned

*With Deadpool*

Wade pulled the pink skinned woman onto his lap, sliding into her dark purple pussy

"Hmm...Oh...I NEVER get tired of this." Shiklah smiled as Wade began to thrust into her.

"Babe. It's gonna be a LONG weekend." Wade smiled as he began to nuzzle up and down from her neck to her breasts.

"Don't leave me out!" Domino grinned, shoving her tongue up Shiklah's asshole

"Hmm...Kinky isn't she?" Shiklah asked her husband

"Really? I didn't notice." Wade joked

As Domino heard this she began to finger Shiklah's pussy with Wade still in her thinking 'I'll show YOU kinky!'

"AH! O... oh my!" Shiklah screamed in pleasure

"Fucking...HELL!" Wade came straight into Shiklah's pussy.

"AH...! Wade..." Shiklah moaned in ecstasy as she was cumming from both Wade's and Domino's fingers

'My life... is awesome!' Wade thought with a grin

* * *

 **Grey** : And there we go! Well, that's Chapter one done!

 **Wade** : Thanks a lot man, this... this means a lot. *holding back tears of joy*

 **Grey** : Come on Wade, don't cry yet. We aren't even on Chapter three yet.

 **Wade** : *perks up* Chapter 3?

 **Grey** : *grins* Wait and see. Later guys!


	2. The CopyCat

Well, here's the second chapter and another familiar face!

Co-Written by: GhostKaizer

Disclaimer: Don't own Deadpool or Marvel

* * *

 **Deadpool gets pus... WADE GET AWAY FROM MY KEYBORED**

 **Chapter 2: The CopyCat  
**

* * *

It was the next day. Domino and Shiklah were still sleeping in after last night's "session", Wade was in the kitchen making a shit-tonne of pancakes that only The Hulk could eat and he sighed as the smell of cooking batter wafted through the air.

"Hmmmm. Now THATS good." He smiled

A ring came from the phone "Hola, Casa de Wilson." Wade answered in a fake Spanish/Mexican accent.

"Who is this?"

"Hi Wade." A seductive female voice answered back

"What the...CopyCat?! How'd you get this number?" Wade asked

"It was written on my underwear in permanent marker. After hours of trying to wipe it off it got stuck in my head." Said person answered

"I... oh... er... why are you calling?" He asked nervously

"Can't an old friend call every now and then?" CopyCat asked playfully

"You don'g normally." He said simply "Plus, I am making pancakes."

"Ooh pancakes. Mind if I come over for some?" CopyCat asked quickly

"Now wait a min-" Wade began to speak before being interrupted

"GREAT! I'll be right over." CopyCat answered before hanging up

"What just happened?" He asked simply to the audience.

Everyone shrugged as the doorbell went off

Wade went to open it and saw Copycat, Vanessa Carlysle, standing before him. 'At least I preferred THIS Carlysle to the other ones.' He thought to himself "Hi Vanessa." he waved awkwardly.

"Hey." She smiled

"Why're you here?" Wade asked

"Just popped in for a visit...and your pancakes." Vanessa smiled

"... that's an innuendo, isn't it?" He deadpanned

"It could be. Or I could just be here to say hi and a bite to eat." Vanessa smiled "Can I come in?"

"... fine." He sighed, letting his ex into his home

"Wow...interesting decor Wade." Vanessa was half-awestruck half-critical.

"Thanks. Shiklah liked keeping things: homely but dominant." Wade answered

"I can see..." Vanessa responded seeing a collection of knives that we're engraved with "Anti-Vampire" symbols

"... we kicked Dracula's ass." he half joked

"Okay...so anyway...pancakes." Vanessa thought.

"Huh? Oh yea. Sure." He nodded

As Vanessa sat down Wade noticed that she had a briefcase on her person. Wade thought of three possibilities:

1) She had become a travelling saleswoman and he was a potential client

2) She had a shit-tonne of cash on her person from robbing a bank

3) She had left her place and became homeless, needing a place to stay

'I hope it's the second one.' Wade thought to himself

"So... er... what's with the case?" He asked

"Just...err...I've become a travelling saleswoman and I was feeling hungry so I figured "Why not visit The Pancake Master instead of spending $9.95 at a diner for a small stack." So I came round." Vanessa answered

"Yea... right." He chuckled

"So...yeah. That-that's why." Vanessa gave a small awkward smile

"Hmm." Wade nodded. "Syrup or sauce?" he asked

"Syrup please." She smiled

"One stack of syrup pancakes coming up." Wade nodded and started to flip some batter.

"Hmm...pancakes..." Domino's voice was heard in another room.

"... Domino?" CopyCat muttered

"Huh? Yeah, she's sleeping in the bedroom." Wade answered honestly.

"... why?" She asked as her pancakes where given to her

"We had a job. It was late so she used my bed." Wade answered not giving ALL the details.

"... okay." She said suspeciously, eating her pabcakes

Domino sleep-hobbled to the kitchen smelling the pancakes "Yum..." she drooled slightly.

Vanessa froze, fork half way to her mouth, as she saw Domino... naked

"Err..." Vanessa stared

"Oh...we have a guest." Domino yawned

"Yeah. Just for breakfast." Wade answered

"And Dom... you're naked."

"Oh...oh yeah." Domino observed staring at her breasts. "Hand me a towel?"

"Here you go." Wade handed his shirt instead, that covered down to Domino stomach still exposing her waist.

"Thanks." She smiled, sitting down and eating

"Hmm...great pancakes Wade." Domino sighed contently

"No problem. Give me a minute, I want to check on Shiklah." Wade answered

'Anthoer woman?!' Vanessa thought eating the pancakes

"Hmm..." Shiklah's body moved slightly under the covers as Wade rocked her gently.

"Come on baby, wake up! I made my super special pankakes!" He whispered wkth a loving and mad grin

"Hmm...Baby...five more minutes..." Shiklah asked in a mumbling voice

"If you don't...I won't give you my REALLY special Crepe Suzette." Wade teased

"I'm up!" She called, sitting up and instantly awake

'Every time.' Wade smiled "Come on. We've got a guest." Wade got up along with Shiklah...who was just wearing pjama bottoms, exposing her breasts. "Hey! No comments about my wife!" Wade talked to the audience and warned the two writers.

"What did WE do?" Ghost asked

"We are talking abouf half naked married Succubus." Grey shrugged

"Not our fault for pointing out the crucial and tantalizing details on your wife Wade." Ghost defended

"Fine." Wade rolled his eyes "No crepes for you."

"Wade, it is too early for you to get like this." Shiklah aighed

"Sorry love." Wade apologized

Entering the kitchen Vanessa was gaping seeing this beautiful woman walk in with Wade.

"Close your mouth at the table." Domino spoke as she took a bite of her pancakes.

The shap shifting girl growled, her form shaking lightly

"I take it this woman is a friend of yours." Shiklah asked trying not to sound offensive; nut to Vanessa it DID sound offensive.

She didn't want to be called "This woman" she wanted to be RECOGNIZED.

"I am CopyCat, his ex." She glared

"Oh. Hello CopyCat. I'm Shiklah." She responded politely.

"Nice... to meet you." She said through gritted teeth

"Will you be here long?" Shiklah asked as she sat down to eat some Crepe Suzette.

"Maybe." Vanessa shrugged

"Oh, well we DO have room...if we relocate the weapons in the guest room." Shiklah pondered

"Whoa-ho-ho. Isn't that a bit drastic?" Wade asked

"Not necessarily, you have that "magic satchel" don't you?" Shiklah debated.

"But... my babies need to be comfertable when theres no job!" Wade pouted

"Wade. We have guests. And I think it's fair to Ms CopyCat to have a peaceful respite if she's staying." Shiklah responded

Wade pouted, turning away

"Wade...Baby...Do it for me...Please..." Shiklah asked sultry

Vanessa heard how she was emphasizing her words and hoped to see how she could talk to Wade like that.

"O... okay." He sighed, lovestruck

"One plate of Crepe Suzette coming up."

"Thank you." Shiklah smiled as she got each of them a drink.

"You're good at that." Domino smiled "I can't get him to shut p, even shooting him in the dick didn't work... not that I want to shoot that wonderful snake ever again... unless it grows every time it heals in which case I think I can spare a bullet or two." She ended with a laugh

"It does. But don't. If you do I pee funny for a few hours." Wade deadpanned

"Ew, gross!" Domino groaned lightly

"Did NOT need to know that."

"Sorry." Wade answered handing the Crepe Suzette to Shiklah. "My Dear."

"Thank you." Shiklah answered

As the four continued their breakfast Vanessa was feeling intimidated by these two women; originally thinking that Wade was on his own, she hoped to get back into his life.

But those two... THEY WHERE GORGIOUS!

"So...Vanessa, how long are you thinking of staying?" Domino asked

"Just a while." Vanessa answered

She looked away with a small flinch

"Oh. Well, I hope you'll enjoy your stay." Shiklah smiled

"Thanks..." Vanessa half-smiled

* * *

*time skip*

'I can't believe it. I can't stay here...but where else can I go?' Vanessa thought sadly

She was sat in 'her room' looking at her suitcase

She sighed with tears forming in her eyes 'It's not fair...'

A knock came at the door. "Hey Vanessa you okay?" It was Domino.

"Yea." She groaned

"Okay. Listen we're heading out for some stuff; want to come along?" Domino asked

"I'm fine." She frowned

"Okay...Do you need anything? Anything at all." Domino offered

"I'm. Fine."

"Okay...I'll see you later." Domino answered kindly.

Copy Cat hugged herself as she sat at her bed

In the other room Wade, Shiklah and Domino were ready to head out. But Domino had a nagging feeling she had to get rid of. "Guys. I think Vanessa might want stay for the long run."

"I don't see a problem." Wade shrugged

"I think CopyCat needs to hear that from you Wade." Domino answered pointing to the guest room door.

"Yea yea, whatevee. We'll catch up." He waved

"Don't be TOO long Wade." Shiklah smiled

"I won't." He waved

As Shiklah and Domino left; Wade walked to the guest room and knocked on the door. "Vanessa? You okay?" he asked

"Yes." She said

"Mind if I come in?" Wade asked

"... sure." She sighed, knowing he would even if she said no

As Wade entered he saw her suitcase half opened with her clothes inside of it. "Going somewhere?" He asked

"Yea. I don't want to rake up space." She half lied

"Come on. You're thinking that you'll be nothing but a burden. That's not true Vanessa." Wade reassured her

"Yes it is. I left my old place hoping to find you on your own...and now...living with two gorgeous women...What hope do I have?" Vanessa confessed

"... because you ARE beautiful?" He shrugged

"I'm not. All I'm good for is being a cock-sleeve." Vanessa demeaned herself

"You ARE beautiful... and we CAN have fun with a 'good old cock sleeve'." Wade grinned

"W-What do you mean?" Vanessa asked

"I mean: THIS!" Wade answered and kissed Vanessa tenderly.

Vanessa gasped at the feeling, returning the kiss softly

"Hmm...Hmm..." Wade and Vanessa moaned as they began to tongue kiss each other.

The two fell to the bed, scattering her packed and unpacked cloths

"W-Wade..." Vanessa moaned as Wade began to nuzzle her neck

"What?" he asked

"Are-are you sure...?" Vanessa began to talk but was lost in the pleasure.

"Sure with what Miss 'I'm a cocksleeve'?" He teased

"If...You want to fuck me." Vanessa answered

"Course I'm sure. Besides, I...WE want you to stay with us." Wade smiled

"What?" She asked

"We each agreed to let you stay." Wade smiled as he kissed down her neck and began to knead her breasts

"Hmm, oh...Wade..." Vanessa moaned and also began to tear up.

Wade ripped her top off, kissing her large blue breasts

"AH, W-Wade..." Vanessa moaned

As Wade kept kissing her breasts with his mouth and teased with one hand, his other hand was teasing down her pants.

"This is gonna be fun." He grinned

"W-Wade..." Vanessa moaned as she kissed him passionately

Deadpool kissed her back, threading his fingers through her white hair as he slid his fingers into her pussy

"Oh, oh god...!" Vanessa moaned

"Man, you're tight. And I'm just using my fingers." Wade grinned

"... did you tighten yourself though? You weren't THIS tight before."

"I-I...Haven't fucked anyone...In a while." Vanessa answered

"WOW. No wonder." Wade responded wiggling his fingers within CopyCat's pussy

Vanessa moaned, her head falling back

"W-Wade..." Vanessa called his name.

"Vanessa..." Wade kissed down her neck to her breasts down to her stomach then traced it back up to her lips.

"I-I'm cumming!" She moaned

"Good." He grinned

As Vanessa came, Wade pulled his fingers out and let her cum on the bed sheets.

"Now...I think it's time for me to return the favour." Wade smiled

"... huh?" She muttered

Wade had positioned himself above her his trousers removed and aimed at her dripping pussy. "I think we need to get...CLOSER!" Wade smiled "Ready?"

"Please!" She nodded

With a single thrust Wade penetrated Vanessa's pussy, making her arch back in pleasure. 'Bloody hell! It's almost like fucking a virgin!' Wade thought with a smile as he began to kiss Vanessa while thrusting into her.

"WADE!" she moaned, her body shaking in ectasy at the feeling

"Hmm, hmm, hmm." Both moaned as Wade kissed her.

Vanessa began to rock on the bed and managed to flip the Merc with the Mouth onto his back and she was in the cowgirl position.

"You're mine." She whispered

"Oh really?" Wade smiled and continued to thrust into Vanessa's pussy

"AH! OH FUCK!" She moaned

"Be honest; you came back for me right?" Wade asked

"W-Why AH-RE y-you talking about...That...Now?" Vanessa asked

"Cause I want to know." Wade began to finger her asshole.

"AH GOD! W-WADE!" Vanessa moaned

"Well?" He grinned

"Y-Yes. I came...ah! I came back for you!" Vanessa moaned as she tightened up on his cock

"Jeez. You sure you don't have a boa constrictor in your pussy?" he joked

Vanessa just moaned, her pussy tightening further

'Ow, ow, ow, OW! JESUS how long HAVE you been abstinent?!' Wade screamed in his mind but pulled Vanessa down to his level and began to tongue kiss her.

The two just moaned, cumming

"Ha, ha, ah..." Vanessa panted on Wade's chest with him stroking her hair softly.

"That was fun." He smiled

Vanessa didn't answer because of her ecstatic pleasure. "Hmm..." she moaned happily

Wade couldn't move because of Vanessa had begun to sleep on Wade...even though his dick was still inside of her pussy.

"Oh... good god." He groaned

"Guys seriously?" Wade asked the writers

"Don't blame me." Grey defended

"Sorry." Ghost apologized

Wade rolled his eyes and slid out of Vanessa's hug and her pussy hoping to catch up with Shiklah and Domino...but he couldn't leave Vanessa like this.

"... what do I say?" He frowned

"Just tell her the truth. Tell her you want her here." Ghost answered

"... she's asleep." He deadpanned

"You know what I mean Wade...You need a dream sequence time skip so you can talk to her?" Ghost asked

"Please." He nodded

"Okay one "Dream Sequence Time Skip" coming up." Ghost nodded

* * *

*Insert dream sequence time skip...think the wibble effect you see in flashback effects*

"Hmm..." Vanessa stirred

"Thanks." Wade gave a thumbs up.

"Hey babe." He waved

"Hi..." Vanessa's eyes were glistening with joy

"I want you to stay here." He said simply

"W-What?" Vanessa asked not believing what she just heard thinking it was a dream

"I. Want you. To stay. Here." Wade answered carefully

"This is a dream..." Vanessa began to tear up

"I can prove it's real." Wade answered and began to kiss her again, thus reassuring Vanessa that it WAS reality.

As well as the fact he rubbed her pussy

"Hmm, hmm, hmm...Okay, okay..." Vanessa moaned "I-I believe you..." she nuzzled into Wade's neck.

"Good." He grinned

* * *

*In the other room*

"So...I think we may need a bigger house Shiklah." Domino spoke

"Hmm...Wade's getting QUITE the lover's nest." Shiklah agreed looking at a property site on Wade's computer.

"True." Domino nodded "Question is, whos next?"

"I don't know...who's your money on?" Shiklah asked

"Probably either clones or an X-Girl." Domino answered

"... I agree." She nodded

And speaking of the devil Wade come in with Vanessa blushing brightly. "What're you talking about?" Wade asked

"Not a lot." Domino chuckled


	3. Family Love

**BlazeEBlakeTD** : Maybe

 **sneak13579** : You're in luck. And then some.

 **Story Artist:** Maybe.

And here are a few reviews answered by Ghost:

 **RedGargoyle09** : Who's Jazinda? In any case: SHe-Hulk might make an appearance

 **Rexy** : Maybe some time soon.

Co-Written by: GhostKaizer

Disclaimer: Don't own Deadpool or Marvel

* * *

 **Deadpool gets pus... WADE GET AWAY FROM MY KEYBORED**

 **Chapter 3: Family Love  
**

* * *

"Okay...NEXT time...I choose the mission Wade." Domino shouted as they were running from AIM soldiers

"Come on...It's worth the money!" Deadpool answered

"No. It's worth DOUBLE the money!" she snapped, only for laser beams to go through the AIM soldier's chests

"Where's your sense of adventure and fun?" Deadpool asked throwing a couple of turtle grenades at the AIM soldiers

"What are those?" Domino shouted

"Wait for it..." Deadpool answered

"Hello." the turtles spoke in a squeaky voice

"What?!" the soldiers asked before they were atomized by the turtle explosions.

"What the? What was that?" Deadpool asked

"I dunno." Domino stopped at a sudden halt.

"Wade!" A voice called, a man with white hair ansd one glowing eye walked over

"Wait I know that voice." Wade spoke stopping in place levitating over a deep hole "Bet you thought I was gonna fall." He smirked as he walked back to solid land and saw the source of the voice "Cable my old pal! What brings you here? If it's about me stealing that thermite grenade... I am sorry!"

"I'm not here about that Wade. Although I AM mad at you because of that." Cable spoke.

"Then why?" Domino asked her old friend

"I have a mission for you. It's a matter of protecting Mutant kind." Cable spoke seriously

'Oh God, not a sentence into this and Cable's already on about the end of mutant race.' Wade thought

 _'Pay attention, it could be worth something in the near future.'_ Wade's shoulder angel spoke

 **'Come on...It's Cable; it's always: ME, ME, ME! Save the future this, save the future that. Just tell him to take a hike!'** Wade's shoulder devil rebutted

"WADE!" Domino slapped Wade on the back of his head

"OW! Hey, I was thinking!" Wade rubbed his head

"Cable was telling us about Hope." Domino tapped her foot impatiently.

"Hope? Again? The whole 'Hope' for the future BS?" Wade sais with a raised eyebrow

"Yes Wade. And while you were existing in your mind, I was explaining: I have chosen to send her back to this time to protect her from the destruction of the future." Cable explained again

"... she who?"

"Hope. My adoptive daughter." Cable answered as he created a time portal revealing the girl in question. Only she wasn't a young girl, she was a woman of twenty; she had flowing red hair that cascaded down to her shoulders and emerald green eyes. She was wearing a mainly green outfit with yellow accents and a brown cloak

"Oh! Little Red! Hey kiddo, it's your Uncle Wade!" Deadpool waved with a wide grin

"Hi." Hope waved back

"Hope, as you know this is "Uncle Wade" and this is Domino his..." Cable began to introduce his adoptive daughter to the duo

"I'm Wade's girlfriend." Domino interrupted

"... whatever. They'll look after you." Cable sighed

"Later Summer's!" Wade yelled

"Bye dad." Hope hugged her father

"Goodbye my dear. Stay out of trouble." Cable reciprocated it

"I won't be trouble." Hope answered

"I mean your Uncle Wade." Cable stared at the Merc with the Mouth who was currently strapping a C4 explosive to an already dangerous Mine Turtle.

"... what?" Wade asked in confusion as everyone was staring at him

"I'll keep an eye on her. Don't worry Cable." Domino reassured him

"Thank you Neena." Cable used Domino's real name.

Domino's eye twitched as she slowly reached for her gun making Cable gulp and time travel out of there "Coward." Domino commented

"No he isn't!" Hope snapped lightly

"Not in the sense of protecting you. In the sense he wouldn't take a shot like a mutant." Domino removed her hand from the gun.

"They're just messing around shortcake." Wade said "Now... let's go see your asshole family!"

"... huh?" Hope asked

"Que the timeskip scene transition!" Wade yelled

* * *

*timeskip- Xavier School*

"I told you: time skips are the ONLY way to travel." Wade smiled

"It took two hours." Domino groaned

"Well yeah...but still." Wade defended the ability to skip over boring things. Hope covered her mouth, holding back laughter at Wade's comment Wade went up to the door and knocked which was answered by Beast "Ding dong, Avon calling." he joked

"Ah, Wade. It has been... a while." Hank McCoy said with a slightly forced grin

"Good seeing you too Hank. Is Jean in?" Wade asked

"She..." Hank began to speak only for a scream to be heard from above them

"AAAAAAHHHH!" the voice shouted and landed face first into the front garden. "Ow..."

"Is in." Wade answered as Hank sighed pinching the bridge of his nose. "Scott?"

"Yes...He's been found out..." Hank began to count off the times he's been caught with another woman "Again." Hank gave up because of the sheer number of infidelities Scott has done.

"Mind if we talk to her?" Domino asked

"... who's Scott and who did he cheat on?" Hope asked

 _'Quick say something and make sure it's tasteful and tactful.'_ Wade's angel spoke

 **'Just tell her the truth! Knock the happy innocence outta her and plot her tight pussy!'** Wade's devil answered

"Well he's an X-Man...and he most likely cheated on Jean Grey." Wade answered

 _ **'Urgh...'**_ both the angel and devil groaned with a face-palm.

"And he's your adopted grandfather and she's your step-grand-aunt." Wade finished

"Oh...Okay...I'm glad my dad isn't like that." Hope answered

"Nah. Cable's to busy to do that." Wade answered being glared at by both Hank and Domino "What?"

"Come on in. I'll get refreshments." Beast offered

Hope nodded, following the others as they went inside. There was a menagerie of mutants who stared at Wade, since word of the Merc with the Mouth was well recognized and feared. But some of the students were looking at Hope; they'd never seen her before and felt almost drawn to her. The group stopped though as a woman with long fire red hair, emerald green eyes, a super model like figure wearing a thick grey jumper with a golden 'X' necklace, tight black jeans and boots "Hello Wade." She spoke

"Hey Jean. Oh introductions: Hope, Jean; Jean, Hope. Jean, Domino; Domino, Jean. Jean, Wade; Wade, Jean. Jean, Hope; Hope, Jean. Domino, Wade; Mr Sexy, Ms Sweetass. Hope, Domino; Domino, innocent virgin. Mr Snookums, Jean; Jean, Mr Snookums." Wade introduced each other until he trailed off... slightly?

"... o... kay." She nodded

"Anyway...why're you here Wade?" Jean asked

"We're here to see you of course." Wade answered then began to whisper to himself "Plus I also read the script."

"Wade! That is cheating!" Grey snapped

"It's not my fault Ghost left the script in the bathroom!" Wade responded back

"I did NOT! It's under lock and key!" Ghost responded

"Then what was the script saying: Wade Wilson Dragon Slayer and Harem King then?" Wade sounded smug

"...Wade that's a joke script." Ghost deadpanned

"...What?" Wade asked

"Wade think about it: half the words were "banana, pineapple, zip-a-dee-doo-dah and a badly written picture of a time traveling pie." Why on EARTH would I keep the real script in the bathroom?" Ghost sighed

"... because your a dumbass?" Wade asked

"Wade. WHO'S giving you a harem?" Grey deadpanned

"... shushing up." He muttered

"Good." Grey nodded

"Rewind!" Ghost shouted causing time to be rewound to the point before Wade mentioned the script.

"We're here to see you of course." Wade answered

"Oh...okay." Jean answered "But I think you'll be wasting your time."

"Why?" Hope asked, no one noticing how much she looked like Jean... for some reason

"It's...difficult to talk about." Jean answered

"Just do it." Domino glared

Jean sighed and let them into her study. And began to explain the situation. "So... you see... I have decided to leave Scott." Jean said

"Took you long enough." Wade joked... "Ow!" he received an elbow jab from Domino.

"You know...you can stay with us. Clear your head for a while." Domino offered

"Thanks." Jean smiled

"Can I ask: what do you do here? It looks like a really nice school." Hope asked innocently.

"We teach mutants how to use their powers and hope to make humans and mutants can live together in peace." Jean explained

"Oh. Sounds like a good job." Hope smiled

"It is." Jean answered

"So you ready to leave Scott in an afterburner?" Wade asked

"That's a bit much." Domino sighed

"Sounds like a good idea to me." Hope smiled

Jean sighed "Let me grab my things."

"Awesome! Montage!" Wade spoke to the audience which invoked a time skip

Only for a voice to psychically through the mansion 'To me X-Men, a situation has emerged.'

"Oh come on!" Wade groaned and slapped his forehead.

"We should see what it is." Domino shrugged

"Yeah...but we don't have a montage..." Wade pouted

"We can have one later Wade. Move it!" Domino ushered him out.

"Fine, fine." He sighed, letting himself be pushed away

In with the X-Men, except Scott since he was still recuperating, was Professor X. He had contacted them all for a mission. "Madalyn Pryer has returned." Professor X frowned

"Madelyne...oh god..." Jean groaned

"Who's she?" Hope asked

"You're adoptive grandmother." Domino answered

"God, fucking damn it Scott. God fucking damn it." Wade mumbled under his breath

"What happened to them?" Hope asked

"They were married...then they divorced...it wasn't pretty." Wade answered

"To be specific, Madelyne had your dad." Logan explained "Scott was only married to her in the first place because she looked like Jean. And then Scott left her and your old man because Jean came back to life."

"Madelyne is actually my clone, made by Mister Sinester." Jean continued "And when Scott abandoned her... he warped her mind and made her go insane."

"In other words: Scott Summers is a dick." Wade answered

"... oh... good god." Hope facepalmed

"Yeah...Look, how about I talk to her. I'm crazy enough to do it. Plus any telekinetic psychic mumbo jumbo won't work on me." Wade volunteered.

"... let me go to. She's my Grandmother." Hope nodded

"You sure? I doubt she'll be in the mood to talk." Wade answered

"I'll go to. This is a family matter." Jean smiled

"Okay, so we got the grandkid and the twin sister...anyone else want to join?" Wade asked. The others looked at each other unsure, honestly a bit afraid "Okay, guess we're the only ones with the chutzpah do do jack-shit. We'll see ya later." Wade shrugged them off. "Hi Logan."

"Wade. Domino." Logan nodded. As they left, Professor X gave them the directions on where to find Madelyne.

"I do not know her plan, but she has taken control of other Telapathic women: Emma Frost, Psylocke and several low level telapaths who she is using as 'foot soldiers'." Professor X explained as they walked down to the BlackBird

'Hmm...I wonder...' Wade thought thinking with his dick again "Don't worry Prof. We'll stop Red Queen's plan and get chimichangas on the way!"

"Goblin Queen." Jean corrected as they got onto the jet "And I'm driving."

"What?" Wade groaned

"Shotgun." Domino winked

"Oh come on!" Wade shouted in disbelief.

"It's... it's okay." Hope said, putting her hand on his shoulder

"*Sniff* Thank you." Wade answered in a squeaky voice. Hope raised an eyebrow, and shrugging and blushing a bit.

As they traveled to Goblin Queen's location Wade was teaching Hope about video games, although Cable would've been TOTALLY against it Wade gave Hope one of his favourite games: Ninja Assassin Night Assignment; unfortunately the acronym for that spells NANA. Hope chuckled as they arrived at the island Goblin Queen was calling home, everyone quickly getting ready "Be careful; she's dangerous." Jean answered

"Hey, I'm the one who's immune to mind control." Wade answered "But...Thanks for the heads up."

"Well, we should do fine . Luck is on our side." Domino grinned

"It's the kid I'm worried about." Wade whispered indicating Hope.

"I'm not a kid. I can fight." Hope defended herself. "Plus I can cut out peoples powers or give myself them."

"Like Rogue?" Wade asked "Without the skin contact?"

"Yes." Hope nodded "But I can also force people's powers to not work."

"Wow. You ARE the Mutant Messiah." Wade shuckled. Wade rolled his eyes and went back the previous line and rewrote the last word. Wade CHUCKLED. 'Freaking Pokemon fan Ghost.' He thought

* * *

*time skip*

"Well...THAT could've gone worse." Jean stretched her limbs in her tattered costume

"You've GOT to be joking!" Wade crawled, yes crawled, into the Madalyn's chamber

"Oh calm down." Jean said, rolling her eyes. Her costume ahimmered, morphing into the green skin tight costume with a golden sash around her slim waist and shoulder length golden gloves, a golden phoenix symbol on her large chest and waist high golden heeled boots, the costume of the Phoenix

"Wow..." Hope stared at her with awe.

"Thanks." Jean smiled

"Now...where IS the Goblin Queen?" Wade asked searching through holes in the wall.

"Right here." A voice that sounded like Jean's, only lower and more seductive, called out as a woman who looked identical to Jean but with bigger breasts emerged, which was a feat because Jean already had an impressive set. She was wearing a black leather g-string that hid NOTHING with black leather thigh-high heeled boots, a black necklace with a red pendent and black leather elbow length armsleevs thag wrapped around her middle finger

'HOLY SHIT!' Wade thought 'That leaves NOTHING to the imagination!'

"Madelyne..." Jean calmly seethed

"Hello Jean." said woman responded

"It has been a while. Having fun with Scott?" She asked, hissing the name of her ex-husband in anger

"I threw him out. I've had enough of him." Jean answered

"Tch. And he's already in the bed of the Diamond Bimbo as we speak. Oh well." Madylen shrugged "And who's the 'mini-you' you have there? Another ego boost clone?"

"I'm Hope." Hope responded with annoyance

"She's Cable's daughter." Jean answered kindly

"W... what?" Madelyn gasped

Meanwhile, Deadpool was distracted "So... I'm gonna be having a foursome with not ONLY three smoking hot red heads, but twins as well as my best friends mother and daughter? This is like the plot of every porno put together! Well... outside the crazy and weird ones. AWESOME! YOU GUYS ARE THE BEST!"

"You're welcome Wade." Grey chuckled

"And we'll be throwing a surprise when you get home." Ghost smiled

"Surprise? What surprise?" Wade asked enthusiastically.

"Nuh-uh. Not telling." Ghost answered

"Oh...!" Wade groaned. As he looked back over he saw Madylen hugging Hope holding back tears as there had been a boring ass super emotional scene he just missed "Wait...are we going to kick ass or is this one of those "happy family reunion" things?" Wade asked as he leaned on a wall.

"Sssh!" Grey said, when suddenly the Goblin Queen and Jean started arguing

"Think we should stop them?" Hope asked in worry

"Okay... ENOUGH!" Wade yelled making the three near identical girls stop, although one had a massive chest and looked more mature and another was a teenager. Once he had their attention he said "I hate seeing family fight so..." ... and he dropped his pants revealing his massive rock hard cock "... work out your problems with this!"

"Y-You..." Jean blushed

"Err..." Hope fainted lightly

"Are you serious?" Madelyne asked

"Of course!" He said, the others now messing with the girls. Otherwise Wade would end up messed up. Plus, it WAS that kinda fic

"If we do...this...it won't be illegal?" Jean asked

"Trust me, I've done a TONNE of things that are illegal. THIS isn't one of them." Wade answered "So, we gonna fuck or what?"

"Sure." Hope said happily, rubbing her thighs together

"You perked up quickly didn't you?" Madelyne deadpanned

"Hang on, if anyone's going first it should be someone more experienced." Jean told Hope.

"Why?" Said girl asked

"Yeah why?" Wade asked

"Someone has to show her how to do it right." Jean answered simply.

"So? I'm hotter than you. I should do it." Madelyne scoffed

"No. I should do it. We need someone level-headed to show Hope how to do it right. Not someone who's..." Jean answered

" "Who's" what? Jeanie? Someone like me?" Madelyne asked in annoyance

"Someone just wearing a g-string!" Jean snapped

"Hey, hey, hey! How about you BOTH show her?" Wade called

"Fine." Jean and Madelyne sighed

"Watch and learn baby..." Madelyne smiled and began to lick the right side of Wade's dick.

"This is a big one and it is important to know what to do." Jean added, using one hand to hold Wade's large rod as she began to lick the left side of it

"Hmmnn..." Wade moaned as Hope looked on.

'They're licking the sides...I wonder if...' Hope thought as she leaned in forward to the tip of Wade's cock. She nervously looked at his purple head before her virgin tongue slowly slid past her lips ans gingerly licked his tip making him gasp in surprised pleasure and her eyes to widden "It... taste's good!' She thought in amazement

'A THREE-in-one blowjob?! FUCK!' Wade thought in ecstasy

"Hmm..." the three moaned as they sucked on Wade's cock like a lollipop.

"I-I'm gonna..." Wade felt his climax coming but the pleasure stopped as Madelyne and Jean pulled back, grabbing Hope and pulling her back as well. The older two then grasped Wade's cock, jacking off his cock together "AH!" Wade came dripping it to the floor, but he was still rock hard from his enhanced stamina. "Okay...Who's first?" Wade asked

The three girls looked at each other before Hope gently pushed Jean forwards lightly "I'd... like to learn please." Hope said... hoping (drums go off) that Jean would be the better... demonstration... and teacher

"Well then...let's go over the basics." Wade smiled as he lay on the floor "First you remove your pants." Jean did just that, letting her green costume disappear although she left the golden sash around her waist along with the long gold gloves and boots

'God I wish I had that saved in slow-mo.' Wade smiled

"Okay, so it is best to be careful and slow to start." Jean said huskily, crawling on top of Wade. She kissed across his chest, her hands running across his abs as she rubbed her pussy against his cock "It will hurt the first time, and it will be hard for me and Madelyne because Scott is MILES away from being this big." Jean then moaned as the head spread her flower, sliding into her pussy inch by inch

'Damn...Scott fucked these two women and left them? That guy's a fucking moron!' Wade thought as he felt Jean's pussy envelop his dick "Next step...a little playing. I.E. caressing a lady's tits." Wade smiled. He reached up and grasped her D-Cup breasts and began to massage them, licking and sucking them hungrily

"Hmm...Ah, ah..." Jean moaned as Wade's experienced hands caressed her breasts and his dick penetrating her pussy

"Wow...it's...it weird watching...isn't it?" Hope asked

"Kinda hot though..." Madelyne answered

"Ex... expect it to... feel really g... good but don't... take... more... than... you can... take." Jean moaned, lowering herself further onto Wade's dick until he had taken every inch making a small bulge appear on her stomach

"Oh...damn..." Wade chuckled as he slowly began to move within Jean making the small bulge move up and down within her.

"Oh... OH FUCK!" She moaned sexily "M... make sure to... f... fuck! To move slow to... a... accommodate the size un... untiil you are use to it! A... and then..."

"Go crazy!" Wade grinned, moving faster and faster

"AH! God...Fuck...Wade...! Hmmnn..." Jean moaned with a little drool trickling from her mouth and her pussy juices flowing out over Wade's cock.

"Yea! Rise my FireBird!" He grinned, slapping her sexy ass making her moan again

"Hmmnn...F-Fuck you Wade..." Jean's eyes glowed with a fiery passion

"You're already doing that." Wade chuckled

Madelyne and Hope were entranced by Wade's determination and stamina, seeing him pump into Jean's pussy with such vigor; and unconsciously, Madelyne was beginning to rub her pussy, with Hope feeling hot down her pussy as well. "I feel weird." Hope said, reaching down to her pussy

"It's called "starting to feel good" It's natural for girls your age Hope." Madelyne answered as she pulled her panties aside and began to finger herself.

Hope looked at her Grandmother and unzipped the crotch of her suit, revealing her own pussy, and began to copy what she saw the older red head do "Hmm...It...it feels weird..." Hope muttered

"But good right?" Madelyne asked with a smile

"Y-Yeah..." Hope agreed. Madelyne smiled, sliding three or four fingers into her pussy with Hope trying the best to copy

By now Jean was on all fours, drool escaping the side of her mouth as she moaned. Her eyes where pool of fire, energy steaming away from the corners of her eyes, while Wade was behind her; shoving his monster of a cock in and out of her like a piston while his hands squeezed and grouped her large and soft bouncy breasts "FUCKFUCKFUCKFUCK!" Jean moaned as she bounced against him, feeling her third orgasm since he entered her growing closer "YOU'RE SO MUCH BETTER THAN SCOTT! OF FUCK ME WADE! I'M YOURS FUCK!"

"Sweet." Wade grunted

As wade began to fully climax into Jean's pussy; Hope and Madelyne were still getting hot from finger fucking their own pussies from Wade's endurance. "Hmm, hmm...G-Grandma...It-it's so good..." Hope moaned as she only had two finger's in her dripping vagina.

"Don't call me Grandma..." Madelyne answered as she removed Hope's masturbating hand and began to lick her pussy.

"Whoa! THAT'S hot!" Wade commented as he was rubbing Jean's clit

"Y... yes." Jean moaned, her hips bucking in pleasure as she came

"Damn was that number four or five you just came?" Wade asked but finally released inside Jean's begging pussy.

"Ha..." Jean's moan radiated along with a flare from Phoenix, illuminating the room.

Wade groaned at feeling her hot pussy pulse around his 16/17 inch long and six inch thick cock before he slowly slid it from her inner depths

"What the hell Grey?! I thought he had a ten incher!" Ghost asked

"Actually I read through. Didn't find a mention of the length." Grey shrugged "Also... I did NOT write that last one!"

"Hey! It's my cock! It'll be big as I want it!" Wade yelled

"Urgh..." The two writers face-palmed

"Just remember Wade: the bigger the cock, the more blood is needed to maintain it." Ghost warned him

"Yeah, yeah whatever. So, which one of you two lovely ladies want's to be next?" Wade shrugged it off and asked Madelyne and Hope. He saw Hope on her back, moaning lovingly in pure ecstasy, with Madelyne leaning in front of her, hungrily eating the teenage redhead out "Well... looks like I know who's next." He grinned, walking over to the Gobline Queen and sliding into her pussy

"Ahhhh...!" Oh fuck! S-so big! G-give a woman some warning next time Wade!" Madelyne moaned as she now had the same bulge in her stomach from Wade's monster cock.

"And spoil a surprise? Come on..." Wade teased as he slipped The Goblin Queen's top off exposing her DD breasts. "I'm all ABOUT surprises!" He jested as he began to thrust into the person he was supposed to capture one way...but was now catching her ANOTHER way.

"G... grandma! Please!" Hope begged, missing the pleasure

"Wow, are YOU tight!" Wade moaned at the near virgin tight pussy

"Only Scott has ever fucked me!" She moaned, reaching down and tried to lick Hope's pussy

An energy saving lightbulb appeared by Wade's head. "Oh Red Riding Hood...how about you try and lift you waist closer to Grandma Wolf's mouth?"

"Huh?" Ghost, Grey and the girls asked

"Trust me, it's gonna be fucking hot!" Wade answered

Hope lifted up her pussy nearer to Madelyne's mouth and they both connected Wade increased his speed and made Madelyne moan in pleasure making her tongue lap against Hope's pussy like a bitch in heat; Hope's back was arched, she'd never felt this level of ecstasy before, she slid her hand under her clothes and began to play with her nipple while her other hand kept her grandmother's head connected to her pussy. "OH FUCK! I... I feel like... something's com... co... I'm... OH FUCKING GOD!" Hope moaned in mind numbing pleasure, cumming almost instantly

"Congratulations you're experiencing your first orgasm!" Wade smirked with a joke

"H-Ah...Hope..." Madelyne moaned as she was nearing her second orgasm. "W-Wade...h-how long...till y-you fuck her?"

"Dunno...could be till I cum into you...or somehow you make me flaccid." Wade answered.

"Alright then!" Madelyne forced herself up and made Wade fall back onto the floor

"Ow! The hell?!" Wade asked as his hands were rubbing against Madelyne'sMadelyne's breasts and pussy

'Y-You...w-won't fuck her...JUST yet!' Madelyne thought as she was using her whole experiences with Scott to her advantage...needless to say there weren't many.

"Oh...trying to make me cum first? Nice try sweetie." Wade clocked on. He grabbed her hips and massaged her thick, plump ass as he hungrily licked her nipples while he spead up his thrusting

"Ah! Ah oh, oh fuck! Y-you're...you're a fucking monster!" Madelyne moaned

"You know we REALLY need to work on your pillow talk." Wade commented as he ravaged her pussy and sucked her nipples.

"I-I-I...!" Madelyne couldn't hold back, she was approaching orgasm

"Come on...show your granddaughter what it's like to feel loved." Wade smiled

"L-Loved?" She asked

"Yeah. Scott only loved you cause your a clone of his old girlfriend. But with me and my love nest...we'll treat you right." Wade answered as he carried on pumping into Madelyne'sMadelyne's pussy

"Oh yes! Please! I... I need it!" She cried, tears falling down her face as ectasy rocked her body

"One initiation cumming up! Ah!" Wade climaxed inside of Madelyne's pussy filling it with his sperm. Said villain now slipped from his cock, she panted heavily as Wade carried her to Jean who was slowly playing with herself . But as Deadpool lowered Madelyne to the ground the two started to make out, rubbing their legs against each other and almost rubbing their cum filled pussies against each other. "Fuck...looks like a scene from a porno...now...for the most rare and precious of all." Wade spoke to himself seeing Hope who was still feeling the effect of what Madelyne and Wade did earlier "A sexy red haired virgin."

Hope was trying to replicate the feeling but couldn't, her fingers weren't enough. "D-Deadpool...U-Uncle Wade...p-please...I want it...I NEED it!" She moaned

Wade smirked and knelt down to Hope's pussy. "Well first...I'm gonna do the gentleman thing here: and make you feel REALLY good before I fuck you." Wade answered as he began to lick Hope's dripping pussy.

"U... Uncle Wade!" She moaned, threading her fingers into his mask and pulling it closer

'Man are ALL red heads like this? Cause if that's true Natasha must be sexually frustrated as FUCK!' Wade thought as he nibbled Hope's clit

"I-I...I want it..." Hope moaned

"You want it?" Wade asked softly

"Y-Yes..." Hope moaned

"Okay. I'll go slow." He nodded,moving forwards so he was hovering over her, and slowly slid the head inside her wet pissy

"Hmmnn!" Hope gritted her teeth, feeling her fingers and a tongue inside her was one thing but THIS...THIS was different. It was a massive cock, that could break her in two.

"Shh...shh...it's okay. Just look at me." Wade removed his mask revealing his unscarred features. "One moment of pain...and it'll be over."

"P-promise?" Hope asked as she felt him slowly reach her hymen

"Promise." Wade kissed her tenderly as he entered her pussy fully and tore her hymen.

"Hmmnn! Ah! Ah!" Hope moaned with tears forming in her eyes. Wade kissed her neck and, rubbing her nipples softly to sooth her "Hmm. Ah, ah, ah... U-Uncle..." Hope moaned

"Hey easy on the "uncle stuff" now. When we're like this...call me Wade." He smiled as his dick was escalating up into Hope's stomach region.

"Ah, oh GOD! Y-you're so DEEP!" Hope moaned as she could feel Wade penetrating her stomach.

"Okay even by NORMAL adult fiction standards this is getting a little disturbing." Ghost felt a bit uncomfortable

"Keep writing or I'll shoot your dick off!" Wade threatened the writer

"Okay, okay!" Ghost replied

"W-Wade..." Hope moaned feeling her pussy being reformed by his massive cock

"You like me being inside you?" Wade asked

"Yes! Yes I love your monster cock!" Hope answered with drool coming down her mouth

"Good. Because your pussy is the tightest ever." He grinned, going faster "And I'm going to make it perfectly for my cock!"

As Wade continued to pound into Hope's pussy, her eyes rolled back into her head from the sheer pleasure, she had fallen to Wade's will, she was his. She wanted to be fucked like this EVERY day. "M-M-Master...fuck me! Fuck me!" Hope moaned

"Whoa! Did I do this?" Wade asked himself as he continued to thrust into Hope "Oh yeah..." He dead-panned.

"My pussy, my body is yours! Please fuck me till I die!" Hope begged

"No thanks, I'm not a fan of Nechrofillia!... unless I'm fucking Death herself. That's a loophole." He laughed/joked before he grunted and came

"Ah!" Hope moaned as her pussy was filled with cum. Wade came so much into the girl she looked a month pregnant.

"DAMN! THAT looks awkward." Wade answered as he saw Hope panting and twitching in ecstasy.

"M-M-Master..." Hope moaned. She saw his flaccid cock and begged for more she began to lick it hoping to feel it inside her once again.

'Man... You WERE sex starved weren't you?' Wade thought as he pulled the girl off of his cock and kissed her gently

She moaned weakly, relaxing into his hold as Jean and Madalyne came over to them "You two okay?" Jean asked

"Hmm-hmm." Hope moaned meaning "yes" into Wade's mouth

"We've got news." Madelyne added

Wade slowly broke the kiss and turned to see them "What news?"

"We've decided to live with you." Jean answered

"Really?" Wade asked as Hope was kissing down to his junk

"Really, really." Maddy nodded

That was when a portal opened, catching everyone's attention

"Oh shit." The colour in Wade's face is drained as out steps 26, 2015"WADE! You won't believe it! The future... it... its perfect! It... it..." Cable said in exiting joy... before he froze

"Wade...why is my mother, my daughter and Jean naked and covered in what appears to be semen?" His non-robot eye twitched while his robot eye kept an eye on them

"Cable...aha...listen funny story..." Wade tried to talk out of 26, 2015That was when his mind made the connection.

His female family covered in semen

Wade with his pants down

And the future a utopia

And Cable, the X-Man of the future, fainted

"Hey... what did I miss?" Domino asked as she finally arrived her suit ripped to shreds and barley covering her nipples and nether region


End file.
